Imagine life as a long corridor with many doors leading off to each side. Every door is labeled with a particular opportunity, an exciting adventure in life. Behind many of the doors lie success and fortune; behind others are life-enriching experiences. Each door leads to a world of possibilities! With strong (Positive Self Image) PSI and lots of I-CAN belief, every door is open to you; all you have to do is decide which room to go into and how long to dally there before sampling the delights of the next room.

With poor PSI belief, over half the doors are slammed and locked firmly shut, because you don't believe that people like you deserve to go through them. These rooms have gold-plated Reserved signs on them, and it never even crosses your mind that they may be reserved for YOU!

With lack of I-CAN belief, many of the doors are forever closed to you. Instead of these doors bearing a sign spelling out an opportunity, they each have a large red sign saying DANGER! NO ADMITTANCE - HIGHLY SKILL PERSONNEL ONLY!

With so many doors firmly shut, it is not surprising that, after walking down the corridor of life for a while, you begin to wonder why you never get 'the breaks' or why opportunity always seems to pass you by? It is YOU who are passing opportunity by! After walking down the corridor for a while and trying a few doors, only to find them locked shut, you naturally become cynical; you stop believing that there is anything behind the doors at all! This has the effect of preventing you from even bothering to try any more handles!


What Causes I-CAN'T Belief?

It is a learned response. When you were born, you had no pre-conceived ideas about your abilities. All of your I-CAN and I-CAN'T beliefs were painstakingly built up BY YOU over the years.

Your environment didn't limit you! You may have had a tough time as a kid, perhaps your parents were very poor, perhaps you were brought up in a slum and beaten every day; but in the end, it was YOU who DECIDED that this would be a limiting factor. After all, thousands of people had worse backgrounds, yet still made a huge success of their lives. Quite a few even admit that their terrible environment spurred them on the succeed. They knew how bad things could be, and they wanted something better.

I agree that it's not easy if you had a bad environment as a child, but who said it should be easy? If it was EASY it probably wouldn't be worth doing!

It's no easier for a rich kid. They had everything on a plate when they were children, as a result they didn't value anything or appreciate the good things in life. Consequently they find it hard to succeed because they are used to getting everything they want instantly, so they find it hard to apply themselves. Nevertheless, at some point you learned that you could use the excuse of your poor environment to great effect. It stopped you trying any more. After all, what could you do? You never had a chance did you?

Other people didn't limit you! Your parents and teachers might have hated you and called you useless, stupid, hopeless and a waste of space, but YOU chose to listen to them and believe them.

They may very well have tried to limit you when you were a kid, but you're grown up now! You don't have to listen to them anymore, they can't touch you! The world is absolutely wide open to you, and, if you had a limited childhood then you will appreciate all the exciting opportunities much more than someone who is used to being able to do anything they please.

I am hammering this point home because it is vital that you understand and believe completely that it is YOU who are limiting yourself with I-CAN'T beliefs, not your environment, and not other people, but YOU. The ultimate I-CAN'T belief is this:

"I CAN'T succeed because there is nothing I can do about it; it is not under my control. My failure is caused by someone or something else."

Nevertheless, when you were younger, you listened to the people who told you you were useless at sport. You believed the people who told you that you would never go to college, never make the team, never BE anybody. You valued other people's opinions more than your own. If someone told you that you were stupid, you believed them!

This may be understandable when you were five years old and the person telling you how stupid you were was an adult; naturally you will believe them, and it is at this time that I-CAN'T beliefs are formed. But you are grown up now! You are not five years old any more!

Copyright Stuart Goldsmith. All Rights Reserved.